Self Forgiveness: How To Forgive Yourself?
Step To Forgiveness
Don’t recreate the past, start from scratch.
Use past regrets as stepping stones to begin again, with a better self, act the new version of your backstory, one where you play life with better decisions than ever before. Now you embrace the future without brakes. But mind the gaps, because even if you think that all is done and dusted as you stick to the past but try to live wholeheartedly in the present, perhaps you are lying to yourself about how much you have really forgiven if the dirt under your peace has not fully been exterminated?
Realizing that when self forgiveness is genuinely felt we are guided with hints, coincidences and synchronicities, then we are allowed to move onwards to a great life; closer to forgiveness’s redemption creating a new start. Creating a guilt free trip treat is possible as you can transform frozen mistakes into summery flames to feed your willpower. Away from shark attacks, own the frightening waves of your life enough to stir your boat in the right direction.
Malin Andersson opens up on finding love again after learning to ‘forgive abusive ex boyfriend’ – EXCLUSIVE
Malin Andersson has opened up on why she’s ready to find love again
The former Love Island star was a victim of domestic abuse
“Post-relationship there’s withdrawal symptoms. It’s so sad but you have to go cold-turkey, you have to go zero-contact. When you do that, that’s when all the healing begins.
That’s when I put all the work in, I meditated, had therapy, built myself back up. Only then when you can love yourself, you can love someone else.”
Malin has forgiven her ex boyfriend for the abuse he inflicted on her
“Trust in the process that everything will work out. Don’t rush. Detach yourself from the situation, because life is about enjoying yourself and living in the present moment.”
“I knew I was ready to find love again when I stopped thinking of my ex and what he did to me with hurt, resentment and anger. It switched to forgiveness and feeling sorry for him and letting go. It doesn’t mean that I agree with what he did. But you have to forgive to let go.” Continue reading >> //www.ok.co.uk/
FORGIVENESS QUOTES
“I have only ever known Guilt to have one weakness, one not easily given and not easily found: Forgiveness…In truth, Guilt’s strength lies not in the failure of others to grant us forgiveness, but in our failure to forgive ourselves.” Kelseyleigh Reber
“The only person we have the right or the power to forgive is ourselves. For everything else, there is the Art of Acceptance.” Rebecca O’Dwyer
“You cannot travel back in time to fix your mistakes, but you can learn from them and forgive yourself for not knowing better.” Leon Brown
“Don’t be afraid to stand tall in YOUR truth! Boldly and confidently face everything that has, and is, keeping you bound. Fight for your inner peace! Fight for your happiness! Fight for everything and everybody that’s important to you! You are NOT a victim! Don’t even play into that. You owe it to yourself to LIVE! Live your life without the regrets, without the resentments, without the unforgiveness, without the blame game, without the self-pity, without any and everything that keeps you from experiencing true joy within! You are too important to waste your life away! Learn to appreciate and value your life, but most importantly, learn to appreciate and value yourself! You count too, no matter what you’ve done!” Stephanie Lahart
“When you initially forgive, it is like letting go of a hot iron. There is initial pain and the scars will show, but you can start living again.” Stephen Richards
“Forgiveness hurts but its reward is priceless.” Naide P Obiang
“Forgive yourself, you are not perfect. Show yourself grace; you are still learning. Show yourself patience; you are on a journey.” Shannon Yvette Tanner
“Life is a whirlwind of many opportunities. Choose to embrace all of them in deepest gratitude. Learn to forgive yourself and honour the heart that beats within you, as well as the head that rests on your shoulders. Learn how to believe in people again and not be judging or cynical to various beliefs.
“We are all of one light on this one Earth, and loving humanity makes all the difference.” Michelle Cruz-Rosado
“Never forget that to forgive yourself is to release trapped energy that could be doing good work in the world.” D. Patrick Miller
“Without forgiveness and love, you will live with resentment, bitterness, malice and strife which result in more pain. You can never love without forgiving. Forgiveness deepens your ability to love and frees you from pain.” Kemi Sogunle
“It’s toughest to forgive ourselves. So it’s probably best to start with other people. It’s almost like peeling an onion. Layer by layer, forgiving others, you really do get to the point where you can forgive yourself.” Patty Duke
“Love yourself, accept yourself, forgive yourself and be good to yourself, because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.” Leo F. Buscaglia
“He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
“Remember that when you forgive, you empty yourself so that you may receive.” Debasish Mridha
“If I hadn’t forgiven myself, I wouldn’t be strong enough to love someone this much.” Dawn Lanuza
“You can sit there forever, lamenting about how bad you’ve been, feeling guilty until you die, and not one tiny slice of that guilt will do anything to change a single thing in the past. Forgive yourself, then move on!” Wayne Dyer
“Forgive someone today. Especially if that someone is you.” Gina Greenlee
Revenge is more enjoyable than forgiveness — at least in stories
But forgiveness stories are more meaningful
When it comes to entertainment, people enjoy seeing bad guys get their punishment more than seeing them be forgiven, a new study reveals.
But even though they don’t enjoy the forgiveness stories as much, people do find these narratives more meaningful and thought-provoking than ones in which the bad guys receive their just deserts.
“We like stories in which the wrongdoers are punished and when they get more punishment than they deserve, we find it fun,” said Matthew Grizzard, lead author of the study and assistant professor of communication at The Ohio State University.
“Still, people appreciate stories of forgiveness the most, even if they don’t find them to be quite as fun.” Read Full Story > eurekalert.org
“Beware of the man who does not return your blow: he neither forgives you nor allows you to forgive yourself.” George Bernard Shaw
“Silently repeat to yourself: I forgive myself for any ways in which I knowingly or unknowingly caused hurt or harm to any living being or creature. I forgive all who have ever hurt or harmed me. Everything between us is now cleared up.” Michael Beckwith
“Forgiveness for ourselves and other is one of the main elements in growth. It allows us to free ourselves of the issues that are holding us down.” Nanette Mathews
“You need to learn to accept your flaws and forgive yourself.” Susan Mallery
“Sometimes our enemies are disguise as family and friends. You must forgive yourself for having chosen to trust those people who don’t care about your life and seek nothing but failure for you. Stop wasting your precious time in trying to make those people see you, understand you, respect you, value you and love you because in the end it all becomes a pointless negative fight for validation that will drain your happiness. Enjoy life by surrounding yourself with those who inspire you and truly demonstrate their love for you. It gets complicated at times but eventually, you will know your worth & leave the trash behind.” Jesus Apolinaris
“Forgiveness is a gift to the one who is hurting.” Josee D’Amore
“All we have to do is forgive ourselves wholly and completely for ever thinking that we are not good enough!” Jodi Aman
“Forgive yourself. The supreme act of forgiveness is when you can forgive yourself for all the wounds you’ve created in your own life. Forgiveness is an act of self-love. When you forgive yourself, self-acceptance begins and self-love grows.” Miguel Angel Ruiz
“Having asked God for forgiveness, accept release, then truly forgive yourself and turn your back definitely on the matter.” Norman Vincent Peale
“Turn down the volume of your negative inner voice and create a nurturing inner voice to take it’s place. When you make a mistake, forgive yourself, learn from it, and move on instead of obsessing about it. Equally important, don’t allow anyone else to dwell on your mistakes or shortcomings or to expect perfection from you.” Beverly Engel
Y&R’s Melody Thomas Scott on Forgiveness and Finding the Courage to Write About Her Childhood Abuse
“That is my biggest stumbling block in trying to learn forgiveness where she is concerned,” Scott says, “because to me, if an adult in charge of a child witnesses that and doesn’t stop it, that is just evil. I don’t know that I will ever be able to forgive evil.”
To this day, she still hasn’t found forgiveness in her heart, even though in readings with such recognized mediums as John Edwards and George Anderson, her late grandmother has asked her for it.
“She always says the same thing now that she’s on the other side,” Scott continues. “She sees how horrible it must have been for me to have been in her charge and she is asking me for forgiveness. She is constantly asking me for forgiveness, and I have yet to go along with that. I always say, ‘No. No. No. No.’”
Forgiveness may not be in her, but in retrospect, Scott says growing up in the environment she did helped her develop inner strength… Continue reading >> //parade.com/
“Forgiveness is beautiful and it feels good when someone gives that gift to you. But it’s one thing for someone you wronged to forgive you. It was another to forgive yourself.” Kristen Ashley
“Shake hands with yourself. Forgive yourself and you can learn to love yourself and others in the manner that brings you the greatest fulfillment of all. With love, all things are truly possible.” Charmaine Smith Ladd
“Embrace and love all of yourself – past, present, and future. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself.” Melody Beattie
“Forgiveness is not just what we receive; it is also what we give – to ourselves.” Ogwo David Emenike
“When you slip up and let yourself back into old, toxic patterns of thinking, forgive yourself before you try to fix yourself.” Vironika Tugaleva
“Stop focusing on your past mistakes. Don’t be ashamed of the things that you’ve done. We ALL have made mistakes. Don’t you see? All of those things helped shape you into the beautiful person that you are today! Hold your head up high because you didn’t allow your past mistakes to consume you. You learned! You conquered! You became a better YOU. Be proud of who you are TODAY!” Stephanie Lahart
“Forgiveness is really a gift to yourself – have the compassion to forgive others, and the courage to forgive yourself.” Mary Anne Radmacher
“Ask God for forgiveness. Seek forgiveness from those you have wronged. Forgive those who have wronged you. Forgive yourself.” C. Scott Grow
“Forgiving yourself, believing in yourself and choosing to love yourself are the best gifts one could receive.” Brittany Burgunder
“Mistakes are experiences. Without these experiences, there is no learning.” Lailah Gifty Akita
“Forgiveness is a choice, but it is not an option.” Joel Osteen
Revenge is bittersweet at best
Research is starting to reveal how the urge for vengeance may have evolved, when it can be useful and what could prevent the violence it can provoke
Psychologist Michele Gelfand has long been curious about conflicts and how we might negotiate our way out of them. She’s especially intrigued by the psychological desire to retaliate — and the fact that this urge is so often contagious.
People not involved in the original conflict may sometimes feel like taking revenge for the harm done to others in their group. They might even take it out on relatives of the perpetrator or others perceived as belonging to the same group, even if those people hold no responsibility whatsoever.
On an individual level, empathy and perspective-taking are important. If we understand our own biases and our own contribution to a conflict, forgiveness is more likely.
People often seek revenge when they are angry, which may reduce their self-control. Revenge often involves risk, which people have a natural aversion to, and anger is one of the strongest factors that can overcome this aversion.
Later, when people get more psychological distance from what happened, that might reduce the anger and the revenge instinct.
Another thing we might teach is that research shows that personal gain is rare and feelings of regret may soon set in.
Indeed. The classic idiom “revenge is sweet” does have some empirical support — neuroscience research shows that reward centers in the brain are activated when people are just thinking about taking revenge, and people forecast that they are going to be happy after seeking revenge.
But other research shows that this is short-lived, and that people are often not as happy as they thought they would be. In that sense, revenge can be thought of as bittersweet, involving positive and negative feelings. Read Full Story > knowablemagazine.org
Helpful Links and Resources:
How to Actually Forgive Yourself
What is the nature of forgiveness
The power of forgiveness in an unforgiving world
Is there a path that can lead us out of the bitterness that makes daily headway in so many lives? Is there no end to taking offense and forming grudges? Where is this now accepted social standard of getting even taking us? Does resentment build up within us over smaller and smaller things? And for those who have truly been hurt, where over time will their bitterness take them if left unchecked?
Consider an ancient solution — a way through —today’s vengeful cultural climate. Without taking on a preachy tone, and in the hope of sharing some thoughts on a complicated topic, this writer hopes to shed some light on forgiveness, and the inner peace, and the enhanced physical and mental health it can bring to anyone who decides to forgive. Read Full Story > By Greg Blass
