Once a mistake has been made and if you have a taste for repeating self destructive patterns, you are left with seven choices:
- To wish having done things
- To focus on blaming the mistake.
- To focus on finding the person responsible for your mistake.
- To succomb to the temptation of dismissing your defects.
- To forget it as fast as possible rather than wasting time thinking about the cause.
- To get stuck replaying a self pity episode in your mind over and over.
- To stand still with the mouth open in hope to be advised by a flying insect.
Unfortunately, none of the above options are applicable by the ambitious among you. In such cases, there is an effective solution. Once a mistake has been made, follow these three steps:
- Learn from the experience.
- Do something constructive.
- Move on.
It’s that simple. So why would you let a past decision bring you down when you can use it as a stepping stone and leap towards a stronger and wiser self?
I don’t know about you, but I’ve made mistakes. In fact, I was born one, in Cannes and according to what I’ve been told on my first day of duty on planet Earth. It sounded appropriate, in the mid eighties, to assign me a name that would, on my face, come across slapping, as a mistake. Obviously since then, people’s eyes have opened wide enough to see that I fit the name perfectly. Don’t get me wrong, I love my name, expect the questions that comes with it and the uninformed who seem to insinuate my name isn’t mine! As for my surname, check out my About Me page, to view the illustration of myself, you’ll see, there is no need to explain as the mistake speaks for itself…
There I was walking alone, mistaken, among the festivals and the starlets, but except for those in shock at the discovery of my family tree, no one was screaming my name. As it was planned, I went on through life innocent but deep down I knew, I wasn’t famous but neither was I, anonymous. And as soon as I became self aware, I committed to make as many mistakes in life as I could, until one day I decided to share them instead of doing them. That day saved me and I hope it can do the same for you.
Why am I sharing this piece of my soul with you? Apart from it being self theraputic, I must share this message; Mistakes are just a matter of perspectives.
To better understand this statement, let’s break it down:
The name: Tatiana.
It is fashion in Italy.
It is a carnival in Brazil.
It is popular in Eastern Europe where the most mistakes reside in Russia.
It is a day of the year prone to be a mistake in the French calendar.
It is clear that the meaning of a word, action or event changes according to who, where and how it is perceived.
The definition of mistake in english is, I cite:
1 – “An act or judgement that is misguided or wrong”.
2 – “Something, especially a word, figure, or fact, which is not correct; an inaccuracy”.
If reading in between the words of dictionaries isn’t your hobby, don’t worry, I am here to translate. I translate: the dictionaries think that my actions are similar to a judge who is wrongly misguided, one with words, figures and facts that are incorrect and inaccurate.
Well from my angle of view and perspective, I contest:
If I hadn’t been born a mistake, I wouldn’t have much inspirational information to share with you. There would only be a shallow person, talking and writing with rules and feeling without impulses. Due to a lack of soul, there would only be technique behind the words, whom have been found online, browsing for ideas, searching through the dictionary to find impressive words that make me seem superiorly misunderstood. Instead I have lived through the words.
Turn your mistakes into an advantage by changing your perspective
Errors are teachers, forcing you into learning something you didn’t have any interest in but in the process they know that their lessons will propel you towards a successful future. Teachers are part of a regretful event, however with humility, one can appreciate them as a catalyst to find out what is wrong with you and how to refrain from repeating the same absentee pattern in constructive manner.
One way or another, the areas of your life that needs to improve has to be revealed. Perhaps you need to develop patience, flexibility and forgiveness towards yourself and others. This will bring out awareness around your values, skills and beliefs.
Move on with compassion and understanding
After acknowledging that no one is perfect it’s easier to accept what happened. Although blaming others or being on the defensive are natural tendencies and reactions, these types of attitudes prevent you from identifying the root cause of your mistake. And, they will get you nowhere except to a more stressful situation.
By contrast, identifying the cause leads to significant self realizations, it helps strengthen your weakest links so that you can pinpoint what needs to change and set up a system to avoid another pattern breakdown in the future. You have to take full responsibility, but that doesn’t mean, beating yourself up and dwelling on the past.
It’s part of life’s learning process to be wrong every now and then. So make it a decision, to learn something new from each mistake you make. See them as opportunities that can direct you towards the right course of action or redirect you in the right direction for you to, move on.
There are no mistakes, there are only experiences that differs according to your perspective.